Courage to be Different

As I approach a milestone birthday next month, I find myself asking, "Is it just me, or am I becoming the older generation?" I was raised in the haze of the 1960's. It was an era of "anything goes" where morals and morays were challenged. It was a time to turn tradition on its head as a generation expressed its disdain for war, sexism, racism, and materialism. Jeans and t-shirts replaced suits and white shirts. The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, and Pink Floyd displaced Frank Sinatra, Doris Day, and Lawrence Welk. Artists challenged our preconceived notions regarding self expression. So why is it that I am finding it so difficult to reconcile this with a society which appears to be spiraling back into conventionality? Millions each day gawk on YouTube at videos mocking those who fall, trip, stumble, or do anything embarrassing that is captured on hidden camera. CNN now devotes an entire section of its web site to people caught in compromising positions. This is apparently news. Often when the Cantor and I attend a bar or bat mitzvah, we are frequently made uncomfortable by the attire of many of the younger attendees. It saddens me that so many among this supposedly entitled generation have been captured by an exploitive society which treats them as sexual objects at a young age. MTV and other channels which broadcast music videos have set the standard for "acceptable" public attire. So, have I entered the "older generation?" It seems that so many of us are so concerned about making enemies of our children-never criticizing, never being "unfriended" on Facebook-that we sit by quietly while more and more adults and their children sink into a world of empty physicality. In many ways, we fear standing out as individuals. It is so much easier to go along with the crowd. Which brings us to this week's Torah portion, Shelach Lecha. At its outset, God in the desert, commands Moses to appoint representatives from each of Israel's twelve tribes to go ahead and "scout" the land of Israel. Two of them, Joshua and Caleb, report that although the land of Israel is inhabited by a strong and tall population, with faith in God the country can be conquered. Not so with the other ten. They return to camp and report that the land of Canaan is inhabited by giants. "We looked like grasshoppers to ourselves, and so we must have looked to them." The Midrash, our collection of ancient legends and explanations, reports that terror spread through the camp through the night. The masses began to panic and begged God to return them to the "good old days" of Egyptian slavery. While our ancient rabbis agree that the inhabitants of Canaan were awesome in size and strength, they focus on the quote, "We looked like grasshoppers to ourselves, and so we must have looked to them." And with those words, an insecure collection of Israelites fresh from the shackles of slavery reveal that they are not ready to live as independent human beings. It is here that God decides to condemn Israel to wander in the desert for forty years. The only two who survive the desert trek are Joshua and Caleb. All others perish, giving way to a new and confident nation, born and raised in freedom. These days, we are fond of saying that our society is a free one. First amendment rights guarantee that anyone can say almost anything about anyone. God forbid that we trample on anyone's right to free speech. But where does the line of individuality end and the road to complacency begin? More and more, we have abdicated our responsibility to show leadership and to make morally based decisions. We are becoming more and more like the ten spies of fear, rather than the two agents of courage. Perhaps in my youth, I was no more independent. Perhaps the bell bottomed jeans, long hair, and blue tinted glasses of that day were no different that the tattoos, piercings, and headphones of today. Yet is it my imagination or is there more of a desperation today to fit in? Our children demand the right pair of running shoes, or the socially acceptable brand of sweat pants. Fear of being ostracized is stronger than ever. This week's Parashah encourages us to pose questions about our own individuality. Are we our own persons, or are we increasingly obsessed with being part of the crowd? Jewish tradition tells us that each of us is born with a divine spark within. Each of us has a mission. Each of us has a destiny. Yet if we allow ourselves to become like the masses, under the spell of materialism and conformity-how much harder it is to reach our full and rich potential as human beings? Let us be like Joshua and Caleb, who had the courage to stand up for faith, individuality, and conviction. No doubt they were encouraged to join the others. But they stood up for what they believed. It's so much harder today. We are exposed to a barrage of commercial messages everywhere we go-from the supermarket checkout to the backseat of a taxi. Each one of us needs to ask ourselves, "which side of the fence am I on?" One thing I am certain of as I approach that milestone birthday is that more can be accomplished by embracing our individuality than by lining up behind the crowd. That message remains in my heart as strongly today as it did in my youth. It's time more than ever to be like Joshua and Caleb. For they exist within you and me. Indeed, we are all giants. Shabbat shalom, v' kol tuv (with all goodness) Rabbi Irwin Huberman